Back to school time is an excellent time for kids, parents and teachers to think and talk about the safe and approprite use of the Internet and social networking tools.
My message to parents and teachers is simple. Embrace the technology that kids use, recognize that whatever you may lack in technology knowledge you make up in wisdom and remember that you, too, were once a kid. Your first reaction to kid activity that may be a bit disturbing shouldn’t be to freak out and shut down access but to take a deep breath, talk with (and listen to) the kids and do everything you can to encourage dialog.
And try to become familiar with the technology your kids use. That doesn’t mean you necessarily have to be their friend on Facebook or MySpace, but before you start trying to control how they use social networking technology, make sure you understand it.
Teachers should attempt to use social networking as part of the educational process. Whether they know it or not, kids are enaged in informal learning through their use of social networking so why not use the same technology for formal learning? And while you’re at it, incorporate digital citizenship and media literacy into your teaching.
As my ConnectSafely co-director Anne Collier pointed out in “Social media literacy: The new Internet safety,” media literacy and critical thinking “is protective against manipulation and harm.” Encouraging kids to practice good digital citizenship helps protect all young people, because “behaving aggressively online more than doubles the risk of being victimized.”
As per kids, Hemanshu Nigam, the chief security officer at News Corp and MySpace offers some Online Safety and Back to School advice especially suited to youth who use social networking services like MySpace and Facebook (MySpace is one of several companies that provide financial support for ConnectSafely). He starts off with the usual internet safety advice: “don’t post anything you wouldn’t want the world to know” and “don’t get together with someone you ‘meet’ online unless you’re certain of their identity.” Then, perhaps a bit uncharacteristic of his background as a former federal prosecutor, Nigam also provides advice about the compassionate and kind use of social networking
- Post with respect: photos are a great way to share wonderful experiences. If you’re posting a photo of you and your friends, put yourself in your friends’ shoes and ask would your friends want that photo to be public to everyone. If yes, then you’re uploading photos with respect.
- Comment with kindness: compliments are like smiles, they’re contagious. When you comment on a profile, share a kind word, others will too.
- Update with empathy: sharing updates lets us tell people what we think. When you give an opinion on your status updates, show empathy towards your friends and help them see the world with understanding eyes.
ConnectSafely.org, the non-profit website I co-direct, has lots of other advice on the safe and productive use of social media and technology.


9 Comments to 'Advice for safe & compassionate social networking'
September 2, 2009
Just wanted to say that I found your article very informative and useful for parents.
I have read a number of articles on this topic which has resulted in my involvement with a project which is trying to get on top of this issue and provide a safe solution.
Its called Mylittlebigworld: http://www.mylittlebigworld.co.uk
We are trying to provide a free social network site for kids which has a unique, ‘child management area’ which allows the parent to keep control of what the child does, plus all children need to be authorised by a parent to use the site.
The site is still in beta with a new version being set live at the end of this month based on the feedback we’ve been given so far.
We’d appreciate any feedback to help us get it right!
September 4, 2009
The challenge of balancing safety for your kids when they go on the internet and having something that interests them has always been there. But I heard of an interesting concept being introduced this Fall call KIZTOYS. Through the use of encrypted USB key that your kids get when they buy a character at the store, they can go into an interactive, safe “world” where they participate in games and activities (they show up as avatars).
This quick video up on Youtube may explain it better. Just thought a heads up to look for the rollout would be helpful. The age group is from 6-12.
September 4, 2009
KizToys Video
Sorry, I forgot to post the link–
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q0xo3lStumc
November 24, 2009
You’re right. Teachers should attempt to use social networking as part of the educational process.
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December 29, 2009
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January 8, 2010
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March 21, 2010
Hi – It’s good to find such topical stuff on the Web as I have been able to fiind here. I agree with most of what is written here and I’ll be returning to this website again. Thanks again for posting such great reading material!!
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